‘Matchbox: The Movie’ Review: A Very Bumpy Ride for Viewers
John Cena-led Matchbox: The Movie released on Apple TV earlier this month. Starring alongside Cena in the Skydance film are Jessica Biel, Sam Richardson, Teyonah Parris, and Arturo Castro. Does this movie capture the imaginative mind of a child playing with toy cars, or instead does it just recapture the pain of modern blockbuster action films?
Director Sam Hargrave has worked in the film industry for a little more than two decades, first as a stunt performer, then a stunt coordinator. He finally burst onto the scene as a director with the action movie marathon that is Extraction for Netflix in 2020. Now, in continuing partnership with Skydance, and most assuredly in reaction to Mattel’s previously successful experiment Barbie, we’ve got Matchbox: The Movie.
Not Much to love about Matchbox: The Movie
Unfortunately, that’s all this film ever feels like: a reaction, with no creative bones of its own. If you’ve seen any action film of the last 10–15 years, you’ve seen this one. John Cena himself feels directly spun off his appearances in franchises like Transformers and Fast & Furious.
This is all worsened by the way this film tightly holds on to its Mattel Children’s Toy branding, causing a stir of conflicting tones and ideas. Typically any reference to or scene with Matchbox toys themselves feels like a complete reshoot and add-on. All of this begs the question: why is a Matchbox cars film being made this way at all?
Tell me if you’ve heard this one before: Secret Agent Mr. Capable has to track down a nuclear warhead before his compatriot turned enemy wields it in such a way that the entire world as they know it would be in danger. Now tell me if you’ve heard this one: a boy moves away from his closest friends before getting a chance at closure, and reuniting with them decades later, he learns he never should have left that old life behind in the first place. Congratulations! You’ve seen Matchbox: The Movie.
If I was imagining what Matchbox: The Movie would be, I’d assume one of two things: one, it’s a biopic about the creation of Matchbox toys themselves (the opening sequence makes a reference to some mythologized idea of this), or two, it’s a children’s film about playing with Matchbox cars in one way or another.
If Sam Hargrave intended for this to be a filed-down, no edginess added, children’s idea of an action film, then I can throw my hands up and say fair enough (though I’d question if any children would actually enjoy this movie).
This Mattel-based film needs to go back for repairs
But what it really is, point-blank period, when you’re watching this movie for yourself, is a confused mess. A script that seems to have been saved by the Matchbox IP coat of paint, and otherwise probably would’ve never been produced.
Characters speak only in cliché, and cleverness is clouded by how clearly clever the film thinks it is. One scene in particular tries to shirk tradition by having our suave hero fast forward through the average romantic conversation with a stranger at a bar (children’s film?). They do this by laying out hypothetical conversations for how they predict each other will behave, hopefully securing the outcome they each want.
Instead, by the end, it feels like you’ve just watched a screenwriter laugh at you for thinking it was a real scene in a real movie at all. There’s no truth, there’s no heart, and there’s not even any character. This doesn’t reveal anything noble about our hero, except that he doesn’t partake in a one-night stand this particular evening.
These are all symptoms of the disease at the heart of Matchbox: The Movie. Ultimately, the film feels like a satire. That feeling of a screenwriter laughing at the audience carries through several sequences and interactions throughout the runtime. It’s a movie with no real narrative flow, characters to root for, or tension to be released.
Matchbox: The Movie rating and final thoughts
The only thing Matchbox: The Movie does that doesn’t come off as a joke is execute an action sequence. If nothing else, Sam Hargrave can capture action in the frame in an easy to process way.
But this compiles more and more; when the action isn’t happening everything is shallow, and when it is happening it wakes up and becomes something else. It’s a roller coaster of ups and downs, except the ups barely peak above sea level and the downs scrape the bottom of the barrel.
Credit where it’s due; I cannot hold anything against any member of the cast here. Maybe someone is phoning it in here or there, but they all seem to be having a great time with terrific smiles that can light up a frame. Teyonah Parris, Sam Richardson, and Arturo Castro specifically all bring a palatable soothing charm to this otherwise bumpy ride of a major motion picture.
Matchbox: The Movie is now streaming on Apple TV.
Also check out: Extraction 2 Review: Chris Hemsworth’s Latest Top-Notch Action Film
